I live in the north tower, where they’re notoriously bad, but that’s still no excuse to get on at the third floor with a mounding tray full of food while there are ten other people packed in like sardines because you can’t carry your tray up two flights of stairs.

For some reason there seems to be an endless supply of rudeness in the dorms. Maybe it’s due to the decline of Western Civilization as we know it. Or maybe some people’s parents just should have been slapped. Now we may use these grievances as a form of small talk with our estranged suitemates, but enough is enough. I and hundreds more are sick and tired of the lack of respect for others.

The most major offenses involve the elevators. I live in the north tower, where they’re notoriously bad, but that’s still no excuse to get on at the third floor with a mounding tray full of food while there are ten other people packed in like sardines because you can’t carry your tray up two flights of stairs. There’s also been a general consensus towards ignoring the 6th floor rule. Now the 6th floor rule doesn’t mean that if you live above the sixth floor it’s okay to use the elevator. It means that if you are traveling within six floors of your origination point use the damn stairs. Oh and nothing pisses people off more than having to make room for people who smell like decaying gym socks melded with the aroma of dissected fetal pigs and insist on cramming themselves into the elevator just as the door is about to close.

If you stink or have just been working out and might stink then shower. Equally smelly situations arise around the garbage rooms situated on each floor. I live next to one as well, and believe me when I say that there is nothing worse than have your suite endlessly infected with the scent of vomit and rotting pizza. So here is an oh-so simple solution for this—actually throw your garbage down the shoot. It’s really quite easy. Don’t leave the bags inside the door and certainly don’t just leave half full trays or pizza boxes in there. It’s not only gross, but it’s inappropriately rude and disgusting.

Equally rude are the morons who endlessly shout insults out of the windows. Just shut the hell up already. No one wants to hear you, and if you’re really that starved for attention join the circus; then people will shout stuff and jeer at you until your heart is content. It’s not our fault you were never hugged as a child and now need to feel some form of appreciation and comradery. So do us all a favor and be quite, especially at two in the morning.

See? It’s all just so simple. It’s not going to kill anyone to wait an extra 5 minutes for an elevator. And it definitely makes the world a happier, less dangerous place for offenders, when people are mindful of others. And if you think I’m a bitch for writing what I think, then fine. But I can assure you that I’m not the only one, who feels this way, and eventually someone else will take action, and then we’ll see who’s having the last laugh.

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