Merry humbugging Christmas.

“Deck the halls with lots of money, fat fat fat fat…” Is anybody else sick of Christmas already? I am. The sad thing is, I used to love the holiday. The sadder thing is; I was sick of Christmas before Halloween even came.

The holiday of Christmas is cheap enough as it is; just when I thought it couldn’t get any worse, people began preparing for it well over six weeks in advance.

I understand that Christmas is a big time of year for the corrupt corporations of the world, and to them I’m sure it makes perfect sense to start marketing to us at an inappropriately early time. But honestly, finish one holiday before you start obsessing over another.

Thanksgiving isn’t even here yet, and we already have those guys from the Salvation Army asking for our spare money (a group, I might add, that does not give money to charities for gays and lesbians, and discriminates against them in hiring).

I personally see no reason why they can’t do that all year or why they can’t practice what they preach when it comes to good will toward all men, but hey...maybe I’m just weird.

Granted, I’m not a huge fan of most holidays, especially since many seem pointless and redundant. However, what irritates me about Christmas above all else is the hypocrisy attached to it.

For about two weeks of the year, we all preach about good will toward men, peace on earth, and within two days of the Great Santa Worship, we’re all back to being jerks to each other again. As if that weren’t bad enough, most of us are too obsessed with what we are getting from the people we know to even care about the sufferings of others.

People: The thought really is what counts when it comes to Christmas, and the thought should be peace. Why should this last for only one day? Because our government says so?

How many of you buy your signoths (significant others) roses on days when you don’t have to? It’s nice to get gifts from people who care for you, but it should be the fact that they actually got you something that should make you happy, not whether or not they bought you a specific thing.

I saw a guy hit his wife once because she bought him the wrong brand of cigarettes. That was on Christmas.

Clearly, something has been lost in translation as time has gone on. Christmas has been exposed for the fraud that it is, and believe me, it does not make me happy.

I really do wish that more people out there would actually take the concept of goodwill towards others to heart more often, even if it means doing something as little as opening a door for another person.

Believe it or not, these little acts do mean a lot to some people, especially if they might have trouble with these things anyway. It isn’t that big of a deal, and it’s not like you’re going to lose your left arm if you hold open a door every now and then.

I think that all of us have suffered enough from cheap, meaningless holidays. I think it’s time we start putting our money where our mouths are when we utter that famous old cliche, “peace on earth and good will toward men.”

More importantly, I think it’s time that we stop spending all year waiting for a holiday just so we can get free stuff from the people that we know.

Every holiday special that we have ever seen has told us the meaning of Christmas does not lie in material goods. Yet they never hesitate to parade a bunch of them before us so we can covet these things and keep the cycle going.

It’s time to start praying for peace, and it’s time to start doing it all year, not just during the Great Santa Worship.

We don’t need to have Christmas shoved down our throats over a month before it even comes. That, by the way, is why I’m shoving this message down your throats now – because I know everyone is currently anticipating it. Merry humbugging Christmas.

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