Acting as if nothing happened is not an option and screaming at the person is definitely not a good idea.

There are times in our lives when we do things we are not very proud of. Most of the mistakes we make are reasonably easy to deal with. Unfortunately, there are those mistakes that stare you right in the face.

Sleeping with someone you see on a daily basis can be perfectly acceptable as long as nothing goes awry. Over the last nine years of being sexually active, I have had intimate relationships with people I work with, go to school with and hang out with. Very rarely is there a problem.

I have become very good at not making others uncomfortable because of my sexual escapades. Unfortunately, once in a while something happens to offset the harmony between myself and my lover. When this happens, I must deal with it like an adult, and that is hard.

When something goes awry in a regular sexual relationship, one avoids the other and talks smack. This is the way most people deal with being hurt or insulted. Unfortunately, there are some situations where this simply isn“t feasible, making the healing process go that much slower.

When you have mutual friends, you can take some time off from going out. Unfortunately, if there is talk about the relationship, you won“t be there to defend yourself. I have found that it is best to go out anyway, be civil and find one person in your group to confide in. This way if the other is speaking ill of you, you will hear about it immediately.

If you have classes with the former object of your affection, you can make this easier by walking in after s/he does, sitting close to the door and walking out right as class ends. If it is a very small class, try to sit two seats away so that you can“t see each other and if there is group work you probably won“t be together.

Do your best to not call the other a “non-calling bastard,” or a “psycho stalker” during class.

When you work with your one-time lover, things get a little more complicated. One cannot avoid a coworker without arousing suspicion. Acting as if nothing happened is not an option and screaming at the person is definitely not a good idea.

Unfortunately there is no easy way to go about expressing emotion about being hurt while in the workplace. It may be hard to be nice and even harder to be tight-lipped about it, but if you want to keep your job, keep it quiet.

The other option is simply finding a new job. That“s not my style. I“m “2 legit 2 quit.” Uh-huh.

Allow me to personalize this reference to working with someone you have slept with. About four years ago, I worked at a bar and one night a coworker I had been flirting with and I went out for drinks after our early shift. We got drunk and proceeded to follow our more animalistic of instincts.

Work was quite awkward after that because I found out that he had only had sex with people he loved and didn“t believe in one-night stands. This made me feel like a dirty whore, thus making our work situation that much more unbearable.

One would think after all of these years and all of my own personal rules, I would have learned my lesson. This is not the case. I continue to make the same mistakes over and over again. This is the reason that I need guidelines for what to do when I screw up. I share them with you because I am a giver.

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