My brain feels rather overloaded and I feel like I spent too much time merely dreaming about graduation instead of coming up with a plan of action for after graduation.

The mail seems to have been my nemesis lately. First, I received a threatening letter about my October car accident from the Department of Motor Vehicles that had to be promptly taken care of, and then I received a letter from my landlord informing that I have a week to decide if I want to renew my lease, but the third letter was possibly the scariest of them all.

This letter explained that I have in fact completed all of the necessary requirements to obtain a bachelor’s degree. I am officially going to graduate from college. OMG.

I have been aware of the fact that graduation is fast approaching all semester but now it seems a little too real. I am about to be sent off into the proverbial real world in May and I have absolutely no idea what to do once I get there. That’s right everyone, I haven’t a plan.

My parents have begun to put the heat on me, using the line, “You have a college degree, now go use it.” And I plan on using it; I’m just not sure how soon I plan on using it.

I have decided that I am having a quarter-life crisis. I am 23 years old and only somewhat sure about what I want to do with the rest of my life.

The obvious thing to my parents seems to be finding a real job and starting my career. The obvious thing to me appears to be: wait! I’m not ready for this!

My biggest fear is that I am going to get stuck in Milwaukee (however much I love this city and it will always be home to me) wondering if I should have gone someplace else. I did live in Montana briefly and I wasn’t ready to be that far from home, but now with a few more years under my belt and a lot more experience, I feel like I am ready to leave again.

Or that I will get stuck at some desk job and completely ignore what it is I actually want to be doing with my life. What I want to do is write. Writing has been the only thing I have ever excelled at it; it is the only thing that I am truly passionate about. It’s my thing.

While it isn’t going to be the most lucrative thing to do with my life — unless I somehow find a way to completely sell out and get on Oprah’s Book Club list — it’s the only thing I can see myself doing.

So with graduation steadily approaching, I have a lot of decisions to make. Do I stay in my apartment for another year? And the big one: the possibility of graduate school. My brain feels rather overloaded and I feel like I spent too much time merely dreaming about graduation instead of coming up with a plan of action for after graduation. I am in full-on panic attack mode.

Every one is telling me different things. I should look for a job right away or I should go to grad school right away or I should take time off. My friends who have already had their quarter-life crises keep telling me that the best thing to do is take some time.

While it may disappoint my parents and even myself a little, that’s what I have decided to do. I am going to give myself some time. This time is going to be spent exploring all of my options, career wise and life wise. Because life is too short and it isn’t worth it if you aren’t doing something that you truly want to do and you have to be doing it for all of the right reasons.

It is both exciting and frightening to know that I have my entire life ahead of me.

> Comments